Worry for Chocolate

Worrying Accomplishes Absolutely Nothing.

Worrying is Not Good for You.

Worrying is the Opposite of Trusting God.

Worrying Puts Your Focus in the Wrong Direction.

 

 

 



When I was a child, the Lenten season almost always meant giving up candy or at the very least chocolate. (Yes, I developed a sweet tooth at an early age.) It was maddening. But I knew there was a light at the end of the tunnel and that in a mere 40 days, I'd be chowing down on chocolate eggs and bunnies till I was sick. This was the pattern--six weeks of deprivation followed by overindulgence.  From my innocent perspective, it made Easter that much more joyous--because it painted such a dramatic black and white contrast for me. Lent was sad and barren with no chocolate and Easter was happy and overflowing with guilt-free chocolate to my heart's content.

As an adult, I discovered another approach to Lenten fasting. This approach maintained that whatever you gave up for Lent, you simply gave up. You wouldn't revive it---or overindulge in it--once Lent ended. I found this theory very interesting but I just didn’t know if I could do it.  I had never met anyone who had succeeded in this approach.

 

Still the idea of changing a habit for good was intriguing to me, and led me to this Lent's extraordinary journey. Instead of chocolate, I decided to give up something that was even more precious to me than chocolate, but something that I could (and, in fact, wanted to) live without for the rest of my life. I chose to give up worry. I had no idea that it would prove to be far more challenging than any chocolate deprivation I had ever tried.

 

Now in case you're thinking that this is some kind of cop-out to the discipline of giving up sweets, you need to understand that I have long considered myself the "Princess of Fret" being the royal daughter of the "Queen of Worry." I never intended this moniker to be a self-fulfilling prophesy--but there is power in words. Claiming myself as a worrier contributed to my being a worrier. (It came close to serving as a kind of valid excuse. 'Well, you know, I am the Princess of Fret after all.) Worry felt like a part of my DNA.

 

Giving up worry was a total game changer for me. I found myself saying things like, "Well, I just can't worry about that because I gave up worry for Lent!" And I sincerely wasn't trying to be flip. I was just trying to practice of discipline of letting go and trusting. I was actually surprised to discover how many times the habit of worry had crept into my daily existence. It was far more prevalent than chocolate. So the clever response became my practice, and the practice began to change the way I viewed situations in my world.  

 

As often happens when one is in tune with the universe, I was given lots of signs and encouragement in my resolve to rid myself of worry. One such encouragement came in the form of a simple gesture that I learned in an online book group. It was proposed as a way to pray. A person was to think about something they were clinging too closely to and then close it tightly in one’s hand. The next step in the prayer was to open wide the hand and give it over to God. It is a gesture of trust and surrender, and a willingness to give up control. This, I knew was at the heart of my worrying.

 

I began to apply the gesture every time that I felt worry creeping in or whenever I felt that I needed to control a situation that was obviously out of my control. I simply make a fist and then open up my hand and send my worry on its happy little way.

 

I am marching forth into a future that has much less worry in it. Happy Easter!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

When the sun shines within

On the merits of a personal holiday

There is something to be said for celebrating a quirky day that is your own personal holiday.

For one thing there are no social expectations that you "should" have a good day because it is Christmas or Easter for goodness sakes or possibly your birthday. Sometimes when those days roll around, you just can't get into the right spirit, and that makes you feel all the worse. You may feel guilty or decide to fake a good mood until the day is done. It is tricky to be joyful on demand.

But with a personal holiday, the world is a brighter place--because it is lit from within you. When the sun is shining in your heart--the external circumstances simply don't matter. The weather could be formidable, bleak and dreary. You could struggle with every task before you. But it would all look like you were viewing the world through your proverbial "rose-colored-glasses." The power of positive thinking cannot be understated!

Now people may criticize you for being so upbeat. They may call you a Pollyanna--someone who can only see the positives in each situation. And they will mean this as a put-down.

Who cares? It is just too much fun to see the lighter side of life. Yes, there is pain. Yes there are sorrows and trials and crosses to bear. But there is also hope and friendship and blessings at every turn. Both exist in this world. I just happen to dwell on the positives whenever I can.

So today, all has been right with the world. The birds sang a little sweeter. Lunch was a little bit tastier. I worked just a little more intensely during my exercise time. It was an ordinary day, made extraordinary by sheer perspective--and the thoughtfulness of many, many friends.

Thank you all for joining me in this annual celebration of March 4th. I am unable to suppress my smile!

That's what it's all about!

Hurrah!

Last week I learned that someone I recently met was encouraged and strengthened in a time of personal trial by the assurance that comes from March 4th!  Hearing stories like hers convinces me that March 4th is a gift to the world!

This new acquaintance and I are members of a book group that meets online. Since our group meets on Monday, I naturally shared with everyone about how I celebrate March 4th as "National Do Something Day" which falls on Monday this year. During our meeting last week,one of the women told me that she had clung to the thought of Marching Forth and it had helped her tremendously.

She was originally scheduled to begin her new job on March 4th. Anything new can be scary, but her transition was particularly difficult because of the treatment she received from the former employer. She shared me with how she just kept repeating, "I need to March Forth, I just need to March Forth." And that little mantra helped her get through it. All glory goes to God! I felt like a kid on Christmas morning. I couldn't have been happier knowing that I had a small part to play in this gift.

I am here to tell you that I have heard stories similar to this from people who have remembered March 4th--and found it to be a source of strength. I continue to tell people about March 4th because I have witnessed its power. It is similar to the North Star post from January.

If, at the very least, thinking of March 4th brings a smile to someone's face it is worth it. (Smiles are contagious you know, and quite therapeutic.) Small gift or large, I am more than happy to share March 4th with all of you and ask that you share it with others as well.

And, if you happen to hear about any other inspiring stories related to March 4th, please feel free to comment below or post it on the March 4th Fan Page.

Marching Forth filled with joy!

(P.S. And you thought the hokey-pokey was what it was all about!)

A heart-felt thanks!

"And the greatest of these is love."

This is a shout-out to all of the wonderful people in my family who showered me with valentine cards earlier this month. The out-pouring of love was completely unexpected--I even received a Valentine from my niece's cat. It was such a pleasure to open my mailbox for nearly a week and search for a cheerful red envelope or two each day.

The women in my family are not outdone in their thoughtfulness. From silly to serious to homemade adorable, these were the best valentine's ever and the sweetest card shower I have ever received. I hope to "pay it forward" and instigate some future showers of my own.

Those who love have learned the most precious lesson of this fragile life. Love is the greatest gift of all. May the love you share come back to you packed down and overflowing!

Marching forth enfolded in love!

Let's do the time warp again

“Love is the food of life, but travel is the dessert.”

 

Having recently returned from a trip to visit my dear sister, I’ve been pondering the phenomenon of why time seems to slow down while I am on vacation. Even if I am visiting a loved one, and know that our time together will be over all too soon, it still has the effect of a luxuriously slower pace –an expansion of time. Even if I am away on business and attending lots of meetings, it still seems like weeks have passed when I return. Why is that?

What does the old saying, “Love is the food of life, but travel is the dessert” tell us. It seems to imply that it the sweetest part of our life. Since we don’t have dessert at every meal, it is a treat. And for those of us who possess a sweet tooth, it is very often the best part of the meal. At the very least, it is the part of the meal that we look forward to. So perhaps traveling—or more precisely—changing our venue provides that sweet complement to a savory life.

Now the travel part isn’t always fun (think airport security lines.) But the time spent in a different environment can bring about a recharge of the old “batteries”. With new scenery and new adventures, travel allows us to an opportunity to practice being in-the-moment. We don’t want to miss a single thing, so we are keenly aware of all that is happening. Food seems to taste better, the sky seems more spectacular, and our senses are sharpened.

In some cases, it is all so new to us that we really need to focus on what we’re doing. We are out of our comfort zone and must adapt to the changes with some new skill sets. And this doesn’t just apply to exotic travel or extreme outdoor adventures. It could be a simple as cooking something new for you in a kitchen that is not your own.

Ah, so maybe this is the key. When we focus on something, time slows down.  Haven’t you ever become so absorbed in something that you completely lost track of time? Perhaps this is a lesson that travel can teach us. Perhaps the art of focusing is something we could bring to our everyday life. It will never replace the sweetness of travel, but it could serve to refresh us on our daily journey.

Keep focusing on marching forth!

Hey! Not so fast!

"...modern life is moving faster than the speed of thought, or thoughtfulness." - Rebecca Solnit in Wanderlust: A History of Walking


I came across this quote in a book about walking and found that it captures exactly my feelings about the pace of the world I am living in. Now one could argue that as one ages, life seems to travel at an ever-quickening pace. But people of a “certain age” are not very inclined to believe that age is a factor in anything negative. So being of a certain age, I continue to search for a better explanation for the speed of life.

And here it is. It may just be that our rate of thinking is directly tied to our speed of walking. If I walk at 3 miles an hour--maybe my brain works at about the same speed. As modern technology spins at an increasingly dizzying rate, some of our minds just can't keep up. I like this theory, especially because it isn't necessarily connected to age. After all, people of varying ages walk at varying paces. I also like it because it connects the mind and body, which is quite holistic.

How we walk is how we think.

Years ago I read a delightful book, If You Want to Write, by Brenda Ueland. In it, she recommends that would-be writers spend at least 30 minutes a day walking out in nature to really unlock their creative juices.  At the time I read that, I thought it was a kind of strange remedy. I mean walking is so --pardon me for saying this--pedestrian! Certainly writers need a much deeper experience as a muse. But Ueland was insistent. It was considered non-negotiable. If you want to write, you must walk!

Now, I'm sure there is a famous doctor who would "heartily" agree with this prescription. (Oh my, another pun!) Dr. Oz continually adds to his list the numerous benefits of walking. Beyond the obvious physical benefits, studies are now pointing out the mental benefits of walking--something about preventing memory loss--if I remember correctly.

So walking is very good for our thoughts--but what about our thoughtfulness? I used to have a quote posted above my desk at work that said "The devil loves haste." I had it there to remind me that when I became too preoccupied with pressing tasks, I tended to become less tolerant of those around me. In other words, the busier I was, the nastier I became. It wasn't intentional. I didn't load up my plate just so I could be short-tempered and irritable. It didn't occur to me that productivity and thoughtfulness could be mutually exclusive. But I saw enough evidence of the pattern to post the sign as a reminder/warning.

It should come as no surprise then that thoughtlessness and bullying have increased in our fast-paced world. Perhaps we have traded consideration for efficiency. It’s almost as if we are on a wild ride that spins and loops so much that our thoughtfulness falls out like loose change from our pockets.

The solution may be right at our feet! It is time for us to march forth on a walk and let our pace reset our priorities.

 

Just keep swimming!

If fish could march

If fish could march they would march in groups for safety.

They understand the importance of community!

If fish could march they would be persistent—like trout swimming upstream.

They understand the importance of faith!

If fish could march they would keep their sense of humor.

They understand the importance of hope!

We could learn a lot from fish.
 

Just keep marching, just keep marching…